Principle no 6: Ask yourself what your intention is
This is a very practical one, and very very useful. We often have an impulse to do something that can be linked to an old habit – for example, sending off a particular kind of sms to a particular person in our lives. When you inquire of yourself “What is my intention?” you may be surprised to realise you are wanting to elicit a particular response from someone (control), or make yourself feel better (this is the opposite of holding and having your feelings, it is a purge). At Change Matters we like to talk about comforting your discomfort which is where you hold back from old automatic habits like controlling the situation/the other and discharging difficult feelings. So you might choose to take a walk, save the sms to drafts, or stay with yourself in some other way.
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